The Paperback Edition…
Four years have passed since that tragic day and I am now tucked into my very own apartment that walks out to a courtyard with tall evergreen trees now beautifully covered with snow…watching the next to the last episode of “The Housewives of New York City”.
“The Parents” are sitting on a book shelf right next to my TV. They are surrounded by all my favorite books and favorite pictures of them as well as photos of Karlie, George, Annie and Cantor…and, of course, my best friend Emma.
I have a “Family on the Shelf” as opposed to an “Elf on the Shelf”.
I keep “The Parents” for a couple of months and then they journey over to Karlie and George’s house where they sit in an equally revered place. It seemed like a better idea than…you know…separating them…like eggs.
But now it was very late…scenes from next week’s episode were running. I clicked the remote off
I stood up, stretched and turned off the lamp beside my chair. I dropped the blinds but not before appreciating again how peaceful the falling snow looked.
I put the chain lock on my door even though I know in my heart of hearts that a chain is not going to stop a crazed man from entering my cozy little abode and stealing my super swell TV…or worse.
But nevertheless…I would hear him and be able to stealthily pull my always fully loaded Glock out from my bedside table and blow him to smithereens…HAH!! I have no gun.
But at least I would hear him…
I flipped the hall light on and walked down the hall. The full length mirror at the end was there for a purpose. I gave myself a B+…which considering the events of the day was pretty damn good…in my world anyway.
I fluffed my hair like I always do when finding myself in front of any mirror and then walked into my bedroom and paused…
I clapped my hands twice and my bedside light went on. Yes. I have “The Clapper”.
Don’t laugh at me…